You have your reason for thinking about evil things to do to someones car. However, it might seriously ruin your life if you get caught. Try to rise above resentment because it is a killer. You would be just as awful as the person who gave you the trouble. Moreover, you are allowing that person to reside rent-free in your head. If only you eliminate them from your thoughts, you’ll have the chance to make amends in a decent way.
Evil things to do to someones car
Do you still feel the need to be evil? Just before anything, you have to check for a dash cam or mirror cam.
1. Dog poop under door handles
Apply some dog poop under each of their door handles.
2. Key the car
3. McDonald’s sausage McMuffin
Visit McDonald’s now. Buy the sausage McMuffin, peel the “sausage” sticker off carefully and attach it to their car bumper.
4. Break the bumper
It will be difficult to remove the bumper altogether, so just break it. The bumpers on the majority of modern cars are secured by tiny pop tabs. Some cars even have bumpers glued on with a ton of insulation in between. On some vehicles, you need to remove the wheels before you can even get the bumper off.
5. Fish oil
Pour fish oil through the vents of the windows. That foul odor may never leave. If you pour the fish oil into the gutters, that will worsen the car smell.
6. Spray foam insulation
Spray foam insulation into the radiator, covering or filling it, through the front grill or bumper. Trying to get rid of that would be a nightmare for the owner.
7. Bust a mirror
Simply smash a mirror or both. It’s quick, effective, and simple to cover up and will look like an accident. If you are caught, just apologize and say that your foot slipped, so you unintentionally hit the side-view mirror.
8. Glue the caps covering the tire valve
Simply secure the caps that cover the area of the tire where the air is inflated (the valve) with glue. Alternatively, you can stick a BB (ball bearings) inside the cap and screw it down. The BB pushes the valve core and creates a slow leak that disappears whenever it is checked. Ball bearings are tiny copper, steel, or aluminum balls that are shot out of toy guns and other similar devices.
9. Puncture the tire with a nail
Grab a nail, and make a little puncture on any of the tires. Make sure to put the nail on the side tire. The owner won’t notice it immediately because it will be so minor, but they will eventually after driving with a flat tire. They’ll probably take the time to visit a tire shop to have it fixed, thinking the tire just picked the nail.
Note that small punctures can be repaired, but only on the end (where the tread is). They will have to replace the perfectly good tire with a new one since the side punctures are not reliable when repaired.
Also, think about the person having a flat tire and crashing. If you get caught, you might face harsh consequences depending on the damage caused during the crash.
10. Fill the gas tank with water or bleach
Add water or bleach to the fuel tank. The only sign the owner will get is a flooded gas tank, which can damage the car. You can add bleach. Bleach will cause corrosion within the cylinder in the gasoline tank.
11. Squirt brake fluid on the paint
Squirt brake fluid with a syringe on the paint as you walk past the car. Discard the syringe once done or keep going with it.
12. Leave a false note on the car
I had this coworker who was an elderly retired police officer who was very protective of his car. On April 1st, I wrote my douchebag friend’s number on a note left on the elder’s car that read, “Hey, sorry about the dent. Phone me so we can exchange insurance details.” I sat back and watched the mayhem—it was evil.
13. Add aerosol to the exhaust pipe nozzle
If you really want to be evil, get an aerosol can of expanding foam (used by builders to fill gaps), add a 2-foot plastic tube to the nozzle, and poke it as far as you can up the car’s exhaust pipe. Spray until the can is empty. The car won’t start, and the repair shop will spend hours trying to figure out why without thinking about looking into the exhaust.
14. Add mercury and glass particles into the gas tank
Mercury reacts with aluminum and forms aluminum amalgam. Every aluminum component, from the gas tank to the engine block, will rust. However, avoid aluminum oxide, which is the rust that protects the aluminum from rusting. Glass is good at this, so glass dust in the gas tank will scratch the surface of every moving part it comes into contact with. The mercury will react and rot the engine from the inside out. The dust, however, will not scratch anything unless it is moved across a surface. Mercury sitting in the tank will have no effect. However, when the engine is started, a small amount of mercury and glass is spread throughout the engine, and when the engine is turned off, the small amount of mercury left in the system begins to work on those scratches.
15. Loosen the valve cores with a removal tool
Loosen the valve cores lightly with a $3 valve core removal tool. The valve core will eventually become completely loose, causing a flat tire. Note that negligence and consequences from the car owner can result in more expensive damages.
16. Break the window
You could vandalize the window but you want to keep it quiet with a tool like auto center punch. Although this tool is called “auto center”, it’s best used on the edge of the glass.
The tips may be evil but are only answers to the question you asked. If you do anything evil to someone else’s car, you will almost certainly be recorded, reported, arrested, and charged with vandalism. Moreover, if you get caught, the person may react aggressively or so what anyone would do if their car got vandalized. There are more decent ways to settle, so have a second thoughts before you do evil to another person’s car.