This publication discloses good excuses for ghosting someone, even though ghosting is a cowardly thing to do.
Ghosting could sometimes be motivated by trauma, and you may be using it as a self-preservation mechanism. It may already be a part of you to ghost or cut people off for no reason.
The good thing is that you sense the hurt your people feel, and would love to reconcile. If you find it difficult to openly apologize or you feel they would reject you, then feeding them with believable excuses may be the way out.
Good excuses for ghosting someone
Before you make any of these excuses, the first thing to do is stop ghosting. Ghosting is a cowardly, rude thing to do and says a lot about your character.
Secondly, you must be extremely humble. Thirdly, have in mind that some people you ghost and try to reconnect with will simply say “No”.
Below are good excuses for ghosting someone:
“I needed time for myself.”
Tell the person you ghosted that you needed time for yourself. You need to be real, and if possible, get in touch with them in person.
Explain to them that you could not help the situation. You may add that you will try to be there for them when they need you for something important but do not make it a promise.
You cannot guarantee to show up for them at any time due to how your life is going at the moment. Make it glaring to them that you do not hate them or purposely ignored them.
“I was going through a lot and should have communicated that to you.”
This is a good excuse for ghosting someone but they need explanations – obviously, about what you were going through and why you did not share it with them.
Just say you are sorry for falling off the map for so long. Explain to them that you are aware your attitude was not fair to them.
You may feel compelled to give explanations, such as that your parent was sick, an awful ex got engaged, or life happened and you prefer to keep it to yourself.
You just need an excuse that is simple, short, and tight. If you think it is appropriate, just say, ‘I was going through something, but I do not want it to be an excuse for ghosting you.”
While some people will say “it is okay” others will shove the excuse down your throat. You cannot force them to welcome you back.
“I had some health stuff going on.”
Just say you had some health stuff going on, which forced you to drop lots of things.
You may be compelled to say what the health problem was but you can choose to keep it to yourself or lie about it if:
- Nothing like that happened, and
- You want this person back so badly.
Depending on how you make this ghosting excuse, it can be totally flake. You may feel really bad about it, especially if you had no health issues. But it is necessary to do anything just to get back in touch with the person – there is no judging you here.
Besides, you have accepted your mistake. Only that you are unable to really open up to them, which is something not many people will understand.
“I thought about us and had cold feet.”
A good excuse to use after ghosting someone is that you overthought the whole thing between you and the person and got cold feet.
Read also: emotionally hurt? Strike back like this…
Depending on your relationship with the person you ghosted, this excuse may not justify your ghosting.
If they let you into their life again, make no promises about not ghosting them again in the future.
Moreover, whether you make them a promise about ghosting or not ghosting again, the next time you cut them off will be a big disappointment. They may permanently cut you off.
“I lost my contacts.”
“I lost my contacts” excuse for ghosting depends on your relationship with the person and mutual friends.
First, you want a reasonable explanation about how you lost contacts and how you got back their contact.
Text the person you ghosted, perhaps, late at night and introduce yourself. Explain in your message that you lost their contact after leaving town or your phone was stolen and not traceable.
“I am sorry I disappeared.”
Just you say you are sorry for disappearing. Using the word ‘disappear’ to describe ghosting them is euphemistic, so it will not hurt so much as saying ‘ghosting’.
Implore the person to understand that you did not choose to ignore their messages on purpose.
Explain to them that you were too overwhelmed and unable to cope. Say that by the time you could think clearly enough to reply to them, you felt like you had waited for too long.
End the message by stating that you will work on this and try to ensure that this does not repeat itself – do not make it a promise.
This ghosting excuse works mostly when communicating with a friend after ghosting. If you ghosted your boss or employee at work, this is not the perfect excuse. You would only be telling your boss that you cannot manage or help to reach the objective.
The best way to reconnect with someone you ghosted is to apologize to them and explain the situation.
Opening up to someone is good for your mental health. You would feel understood by ol the person and not feel judged by them.
Tell them the story the way it happened, and you may even get their empathy. Make sure that your story is consistent. Use an apologetic and guilty tone to get them to get over your ghosting attitude towards them.
It may hurt to try to make a connection again with someone you ghosted. You also need to be aware that your message might not be well received by the person.
When you tell the true story, they may empathize. And if you get a response and get in touch with the person, you cannot ghost or bench them again.