It is quite unfortunate that you need some good excuses for breaking up with someone. Perhaps, you need to understand that no excuse is better than telling your estranged partner the truth.
Although there is no perfect excuse to use for breaking up with someone, you can always give them flimsy reasons to get out of the relationship. Some partners can tell you want out of the relationship. Otherwise, they will believe in your breaking-up excuse.
For a reason or two, the love will always die out. It is left for you to make up with your partner. If their attitude is unchanging, it could be the perfect time to call it a quit and move on.
Excuses for Breaking Up
Not many people will agree that you need an excuse to end your relationship. In as much as it is insulting to your partner, it could always be worth it. Besides, we are not talking about ‘marriage’ here.
You only have to be certain with your decision and the fact that it will hurt your partner.
Below are the excuses for breaking up:
“I think we have drifted apart, do you agree?”
It is normal in a relationship for people to drift apart. However, for this excuse to be valid, you both must feel yourselves apart.
Your drifting apart can be due to many reasons you can point out that make you feel disconnected. Of course, when the link is missing, the relationship becomes a burden.
It can be a result of disappointments and resentments stored up over the course of the relationship.
Your partner might ask what exactly you think drifts you both apart. Tell them not to worry about it. Otherwise, you will end up mentioning the problem, and they will persuade you to resolve it. This means you are back in the relationship.
“Our interests are so different.”
You can take advantage of the differences between you and your partner as an excuse for breaking up with them.
People share differences in interests, and it could be due to factors like age, childhood experiences, and their general personality.
If you are using this excuse to break up with someone, say to them, “I wish you the best and hope that the next person in your life will share similar interests than I do.”
You can end the message or conversation with “ Thank you for all you have added to my life.”
It is so easy if only your mind is fully made up.
“I cannot adjust to your family.”
if you have had an unwelcoming encounter with the person’s family, you can use it as an excuse to get out of their life. After you say you want out, just add that “you cannot adjust to what their family needs.”
“I need to focus on myself for a while.”
Do not say, “I need a break.” It is such a common excuse and your partner already knows you want out of the relationship.
During the process of focusing on yourself, you begin to cut off communications. This works even faster if you both reside at farther distances.
Expect the person to insist on your reasons to stay off for a while. All you have to do is change the conversation to annoy them. They will eventually stop questioning you.
If it gets to a point where they have to phone and you do not want to answer, here are excuses for not answering the phone.
“You will repeat it.”
“We never loved each other.”
“I do not want to always be worried.”
What Are Bad Reasons to Break Up?
While the above excuses make sense for breaking up with someone, there are excuses you should never use. Nevertheless, if the situation is right, then you can use them.
Below are bad excuses to break up with someone:
“I love someone else.”
Unless you think it is necessary, do not use “loving someone else” as an excuse to break up with someone. This excuse can break their heart and shatter their self-esteem. Only use this excuse if you think the person deserves it.
“I am too focused on…”
You are too focused on what exactly? career? studies? or work? None of these excuses are convincing and believable except you want to paint it on your partner’s face that you are no longer interested in them.
Apart from meaning that you are sick of your partner, this excuse also means you are into a classmate/co-worker and that your partner is a stumbling block for work or study. Therefore, you have to dump them to succeed.
You could have any of those jobs that permit little to no relationship but sometimes is a copout in this case.
“It is not you, it is me.”
If you say this to someone, then the problem of the relationship is most definitely ‘you’.
Wikipedia explains it as a popular phrase intended to ease your partner’s feeling to think that it is not their fault but rather your fault.
Nobody is too selfless not to want to be with someone they care about and love. When you say to someone, “it is not you, it is me,” you are merely saying, “it is you.” However, you are putting up yourself as the bad partner so you take the blame and break up.
Many people are aware, and perhaps, sick of this excuse. It is not a good excuse because when there is love, people tend to do anything to keep the person they love.
“I do not deserve you.”
“I do not deserve you” is the same as “you deserve better”. It is an overused line you do not need as an excuse for breaking up with someone.
Sometimes, when you use this excuse, you cheated on the person or do some other horrible things you are not owning up to.
We can draw a fictional example from ‘Suits’, a TV series (Season Four, Episode Seven). Rachel Zane says she does not deserve Mike even before admitting to cheating on him.
“I do not deserve you” comes from guilt, and is a commonly used line by people who have done something horrible in the course of the relationship.
“I do not feel ready for this relationship.”
Your partner is aware of this excuse, probably reads about pathetic people using it to break up with people. Nonetheless, if your partner’s attitude is worth it, and you feel striking their emotions is perfect, use this line.
If you tell your partner that you are not ready for a relationship, it means you do not just want a relationship with them.
This is to say that if another relationship popped up, you would probably join in, forgetting you are not ready.
“I deserve better.”
This excuse is an outright insult and torture to your partner, never use it.
“I need someone taller.”
“No hablo inglés.”
“I cannot cope with your weight.”
“I was drunk when I met you.”
Do I have to give a reason for breaking up?
You do not have to give a reason for breaking up with someone. Dating someone is only a phase towards marriage, so you make all your decisions here before it is too late.
If you must break up with someone very easily with an excuse, pick up quarrels with them and fight over it for a while. It is a childish way to break up with an excuse but worth it if you seriously want out of the relationship.
Is it OK to break up for no reason?
It is OK to break up for no reason. Yes, you can break up with someone for no reason at all or any reason. You do not owe any explanation to the person you are dating except your relationship is contractual.
If you must break up using an excuse, make sure it is not flimsy. The excuse must be taken out of an existing problem in your relationship so that the person thinks they are also at fault.
However, do not be hard on the person regardless of the break-up excuse you use. You can simply say, “[name of your estranged partner], you are a great person but [your concise excuse]. I am sorry and hope we can still be friends.”
Lawrence, you are a great guy but our interests are so different. I am sorry and really hope we can be friends.
Most of the time, all you have to do is to be real. When breaking up with someone, be real with them so that you do not have regrets in the future.
It is not okay to break someone’s heart once, that’s to say doing it again and again would be unthoughtful of you. So, be nice, simple, and real with them.
Nonetheless, if your partner does not deserve fair treatment, using an excuse is okay. Ensure to cut them off for some time to eliminate any chances of getting back with them.
We have written about several other excuses you might be interested in:
• An excuse for sneaking out, etc.
You can combine these and many more excuses from our excuse category to break up with someone, especially if they are toxic.